How are you making sure you are winning the now? Meaning, what are you doing to keep focused on what is most important to you and achieving your success?
Our guest today is Dr. Eric Recker, who shares with us how he went from burnout to WINtheNOW as he talks through some of his books and best practices for achieving balance, building resilience, and creating a life centered on purpose and presence.
TODAYS WIN-WIN:
Take some time and define what success means to you.
LINKS FROM THE EPISODE:
- You can visit our guest’s website at:
- Get a copy of our guests’ book: CLICK HERE.
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- Connect with our guest on social:
- https://www.linkedin.com/in/eric-recker-583849278/
- https://www.facebook.com/eric.recker.1
- https://www.instagram.com/docrecker/
ABOUT OUR GUEST:
Dr. Eric Recker is a dentist, husband, father, keynote speaker, Elite Success Coach, author, pilot, mountain climber, and recovering triathlete. In his second half of life, he is committed to helping people shorten the distance to becoming their best version and learning to #WINtheNOW
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This episode is powered by Big Sky Franchise Team. If you are ready to talk about franchising your business you can schedule your free, no-obligation, franchise consultation online at: https://bigskyfranchiseteam.com/.
TRANSCRIPT
Dr. Tom DuFore (00:01):
Welcome to the Multiply Your Success podcast, where each week we help growth-minded entrepreneurs and franchise leaders take the next step in their expansion journey. I’m your host Dr. Tom DuFore, CEO, and founder of Big Sky Franchise Team. And as we open today, I’m wondering how you are making sure you are winning the now, meaning what are you doing to keep focused on what is most important to you to achieving success and achieving your success? Well, our guest today is Dr. Eric Recker. And he shares with us how he went from burnout to win the now, and he talks through some of his books, strategies and best practices that you can use in winning the now as well.
(00:47):
Now Dr. Recker is a dentist, husband, father, keynote speaker, elite success coach, author, pilot, mountain climber, and recovering triathlete. In his second half of life, he is committed to helping people shorten the distance to becoming their best version and learning to win the now. You’re going to love this episode, so let’s go ahead and jump right into it.
Dr. Eric Recker (01:08):
Thanks for having me, Tom. It’s great to be here. My name is Eric Recker. I am a dentist. My dental business is called Recker Dental Care, and I also have a speaking and coaching and consulting business called Win the Now. So I have my hands in a bunch of different things.
Dr. Tom DuFore (01:25):
No kidding. Well, sounds like you are a very busy guy with running both of these ventures here. And part of what I wanted to jump into with you is a new book you’ve released called That Dam Analogy! And for those that don’t see this on video or don’t end up seeing a picture of the book, on the cover of his book is a picture of a dam, which is wonderful. So I’d love for you to just talk about your new book, the premise of it, and what led you to write it.
Dr. Eric Recker (01:53):
Yeah, so I wanted a catchy title. I wanted something that someone was going to look at it and at least double take on it because if they do that, they’ll at least see, well, that’s crazy. What’s that about? But the premise of it is we are all like a dam. All we’re really doing is controlling the flow of energy that goes through us. And this isn’t some new age woo woo type of stuff. It’s true. Think about it. We have an inflow side and we have an outflow side. The outflow side is how we impact the world. It’s all the stuff that we do. It’s our commitments, it’s our obligations, it’s our jobs, it’s our family, it’s all of that kind of stuff. And you know what? We find a way to get that stuff done. We do. Especially as entrepreneurs, franchise owners, you got to get your stuff done right?
(02:43):
Guess what we’re not so good at? We’re not so good at refilling the lake. We’re not good at it. We don’t take very good care of ourselves. And I’ve been through significant seasons of burnout and the equation was always the same. Too much outflow, not enough inflow. And I think many of us can relate to that. I’ve had a ton of conversations with people who are so committed, have so many things on their plate. And I ask them when and how are you taking care of yourself? And it’s crickets. So I think there’s a big problem in the book addresses a lot of those issues.
Dr. Tom DuFore (03:19):
It’s a great analogy. It really makes a lot of sense as you describe it and just thinking about it. I’m just curious, just to continue on that conversation, it sounds like, and I’ve been in those seasons myself, where the outflows, it’s like the dam is open all the time. The dam starts to refill, it’s just flowing right out the other side. And so let’s say someone finally says, “Okay, Eric, I get it. I’m going to try to close this up for a little bit to try to fill up that lake behind the dam now.” What does that look like? I mean, what does that look like for someone as they start going into that? How would you answer that?
Dr. Eric Recker (03:55):
So one of the first things we need to look at is why is the dam wide open? What are those things we have in our lives that are draining our reserves? And when I have people do this, when I have my coaching clients do this, when I speak to groups and do this, people look at how they’re spending their time and what they’re doing. And one of the biggest commitments we have is our phone. So I’m not just talking about things that we’re obligated to do. I’m talking about the things that we choose into for commitments as well.
(04:27):
So if you’re spending four hours a day on your phone looking at video on social media, guess what? You are draining the dam really fast because most of that stuff isn’t positive. Most of it invokes comparison, which drains us, imposter syndrome, all those different things. So we got to look at how can we close the dam a little bit first? We might spend a whole lot of time trying to take care of ourselves, but if the dam keeps flowing, it’s going to be a net even. So how can we close the dam a little bit and only focus on the things that are really important, be really good at a smaller number of things, and then we won’t be hanging on by a thread and forcing ourselves to try to… I made it to Friday, I got to take care of myself this weekend or I’m in trouble on Monday. And then we don’t and it’s Monday again.
Dr. Tom DuFore (05:19):
That’s really, really good. And just to think about from your vantage point, you’re a dentist, you’re running a practice. Has this happened to you? Have you walked through a season where you’ve had to figure this out? And what did you do in that situation?
Dr. Eric Recker (05:35):
Yeah, so about four years ago, right around the time of COVID, I was torched. So I feel like there’s a spectrum of burnout. I know people are sick of hearing the term burnout, but burnout starts with being a little overwhelmed. And then it progresses and we can get to full on burnout where I was. I was actually going to sell my dental practice and walk away from dentistry for good. I had a plan in place to do that. We were a couple months away from having it happen. And then my associate who was going to buy the practice from me was in a horrible car accident. And so that was off the table. He survived, but it wasn’t going to work out.
(06:14):
So I had to step back and say, what is it I really want with this life? I’ve had this story where I’ve gone through seasons of burnout, including panic attacks, chest pain, heart palpitations, crushing headaches, all of that kind of stuff. I can take that story and keep it to myself or I can share that story, share my journey so that I can help other people on their journey. And that’s where the fire was lit to speak to groups, to help people on their journey.
(06:44):
So I stepped back and said, what is it that I really want with this life? I had a mentor tell me to just take some time and define success. What did I want it to look like for myself? And so I went to work on that. And then I was able to sell half of my practice to a partner. And then part of the agreement between the two of us is that I was going to see patients three days a week. We were going to own the practice 50/50. I wouldn’t have to make all the decisions on my own. I wasn’t an island anymore. And then the other days of the week I’d be able to help people. So that’s my goal, and I’m about three years into that right now. And wow, walking away from it would have been the biggest mistake I ever could have made because my burnout would’ve followed me. No matter what I did, those same problems, same patterns would have shown up over and over again, and I would have continued to be stuck.
Dr. Tom DuFore (07:45):
That makes so much sense because had you sold, when you at some point maybe came out of that burnout, at some point hopefully that would have happened, you may have looked back and said, “What in the world did I do? I loved my dental practice. I loved being a dentist and operating that.” So not making a decision in haste because of some circumstance that was going on. Wonderful, wonderful solution that you created for yourself, too.
Dr. Eric Recker (08:13):
Yeah. And I think sometimes we just have to step back and really, really say, “Hey, what is it that I really like about my job? What’s my favorite part of my job and how can I leverage it to do more of that? And how can I get some help in doing the other things that I don’t want to do as much?” Which, franchise model, obviously that makes a lot of sense. But for me, relationships have always been the key. That’s why I like being a dentist. I’m pretty good at the technical aspect of it, but that doesn’t get me out of bed in the morning. Being able to provide jobs for my team and being able to have relationships with my team and my patients, that’s what keeps me going. And that’s why the flow and the pivot into the other things that I’m working on is natural because that’s what I get to do. I get to be in relationship with people.
Dr. Tom DuFore (09:04):
Fantastic. And one of the things in preparing for the interview that you talk about is winning the now. It seems like all of this kind of flows together, no pun intended with the dam analogy. How do you win the now? What do you mean by that? Will you talk through this concept?
Dr. Eric Recker (09:22):
Yeah. So I don’t know about you, Tom, but it used to be that I would come home at the end of the day and my wife would say, “How was your day?” And I would say, “Well, this happened or this happened, or this crappy thing happened and I’m frustrated because of this.” So I would reduce a whole day to a single moment. And I also would find myself, my head would just churn with things that were going on at work. So when I was home, I was thinking about work. When I was at work, I was feeling guilty for not being present at home. So I needed a solution to this. I was never in the same place, mind and body.
(10:05):
So what win the now is about, it’s the mindset of presence. It’s all about being in the same place, mind and body. Because I find that we are either stuck in the past or worried about the future. We’re stuck in the past with the things that happened to us, the bad decisions we made, all of that kind of stuff. Or we’re worried about tomorrow, we’re worried about the next day, we’re worried about the election, we’re worried about whatever we’re worried about. And so it pulls us out of the moment and we’re not there with our families and we’re not there with our teams.
(10:39):
And so what win the now is it focuses on the now, the moment that we have right in front of us, it’s the most important thing. It’s the thing that’s guaranteed. So during this interview, Tom, here’s the thing. What do wins look like? A win looks like you and me having a great conversation, a win looks like adding value to listeners. A win looks like giving people hope or maybe a strategy that they can start using today. And that’s really awesome. We’re going to take some losses in life. Maybe we had it all set up what our wins were going to look like in a meeting and somebody said something that just got us wrong and it didn’t go well, and we consider that a loss. What do we do with that? Well, we make a note of it and then we go back to it when we have a little bit of time and say, “What do I do with that loss?” And we ask it one question, what can I learn from this? And then when we learn something from that loss, it becomes a win and we can move forward.
(11:42):
I don’t know about you, but I love to win. I would just assume win if I get the chance to win or lose. So by doing that, it constantly brings us back into the present moment looking for wins. And a lot of those wins are how can we benefit other people? So then we start making an impact. And then we come home and we have better conversations. What were your wins today? Oh, I did this and this and this. Oh, did you learn anything? Yeah, I learned this and this. And it totally changes your mindset. And I love that we have neuroplasticity because if we do this for 30 to 60 days and we start thinking about wins, we can retrain how our brain looks at the world and it’s probably saved my life to be quite honest.
Dr. Tom DuFore (12:31):
That’s a great story and thank you for sharing that. And it reminds me it’s very fresh in my mind what you talked about, the win. We’d rather win if we can than not win or lose. And last night was, as of this recording last night, I had coached my boys rec baseball teams. And so there were 45 teams in this interleague program and we made it to the championship game in the tournament at the end of season tournament, which was a big accomplishment. And they break the 45 into three different tournaments within that. So we’re in the one tournament and we make it to the championship game. We end up losing last night.
(13:11):
And so it’s interesting, I told the boys after, of course they’re heartbroken, they really wanted to win. And so it’s tough seeing that on their faces. And at the end, at the wrap up after we kind of clear out, I told the boys, I told them, I said, “Well,” I said, “I know it’s hard,” but I said, “Do you realize there are 39 other teams with over 400 other kids your age that would love to right now have played in this championship game and would be happy to trade places with the second place team versus where they finished in the tournament?”
(13:50):
So it just makes me think about that as we’re kind of talking about as trying to have that kind of conversation just with young men and trying to apply those life lessons through rec league baseball.
Dr. Eric Recker (14:02):
That’s so good. I love that. First of all, I love that you’re coaching your kid. I mean, that’s amazing. I coached my kids in soccer for a lot of years and it was so rewarding. But I love that you gave them that perspective because they can look at the whole season as a loss because they didn’t win the championship. But you helped them reframe that. And that hopefully is something that in more situations in their life, they’ll be able to remember that perspective. That’s so cool.
Dr. Tom DuFore (14:30):
Tell us, how can someone get a copy of your book, find out more about what you’re doing or get connected with you?
Dr. Eric Recker (14:37):
Yeah. So the book’s available on Amazon, that’s the easiest place to find it. And for all things me, it’s ericrecker.com. That’s it. Pretty easy to find me. Have information about coaching, speaking. My other book is available on there as well. I am a huge relationship guy. If you want to have a conversation, maybe you’re facing the burnout journey, I have some free resources on my website for that. But I’d love to help you on your journey. Always look forward to having a conversation.
Dr. Tom DuFore (15:07):
Excellent. Fantastic. And that’s Eric Recker, R-E-C-K-E-R, for anyone that’s listening, and we’ll include that in the show notes as well. So if someone happens to be driving, we’ll make sure that they have a safe place to access that after they’re no longer driving. Well, Eric, this is a great time in the show. We make a transition and we ask every guest the same four questions before they go. And the first question is, have you had a miss or two on your journey and something you learned from it?
Dr. Eric Recker (15:33):
To be able to narrow it down to just one is tough. But what I found when I started to pivot towards coaching and speaking, I cast a really broad net. And what I learned is that if you try to be everything to everybody, you will be nothing to nobody. So the learn from that is find your lane, stay in your lane and do it really freaking well.
Dr. Tom DuFore (16:01):
Great lesson. Well, let’s talk about a make or to a highlight.
Dr. Eric Recker (16:05):
A make would be just trying to make good connections. So I’m a connection guy. I try to have at least one connection call every single week. And it is amazing when you do that and you are generous with the connections that you make, how that changes your life.
Dr. Tom DuFore (16:24):
Very good. One of the things I love about doing the podcast is similarly, I love connecting with people. And one of the things I love about the podcast is it gives me a chance to connect with new folks that I never would have otherwise. So it’s one of the benefits that I enjoy about this process. Well, let’s talk about a multiplier. The name of the show is Multiply Your Success. So have you used a multiplier to grow yourself personally, professionally, or any of your businesses?
Dr. Eric Recker (16:51):
Yeah. Again, I could use multiple multipliers, but probably the biggest one for me has been being in good quality relationships with people who are further down the runway than you are. So I have a coach, I have a mentor, and I have several what I would consider 2:00 AM friends, and I like to spend time with people who are further down the runway from me. If you want to grow, find people who have grown farther than you and then learn from them.
Dr. Tom DuFore (17:23):
The final question we ask every guest is, what does success mean to you?
Dr. Eric Recker (17:28):
Success, to me, means making a difference in this world that is utterly disproportionate to who I am. That’s my guiding principle, and that is something, the cool thing I love about it is I am never going to fully get there. I’m never going to be able to check that off. So I think it’s a good lifetime goal.
Dr. Tom DuFore (17:47):
Is that that definition you came up with when you were asked about, well, what does success look like for you?
Dr. Eric Recker (17:53):
Yeah. And as it’s been really percolating over time, that is what I have focused in on. Now that looks like a lot of things, but that is kind of my due north, my overarching why.
Dr. Tom DuFore (18:04):
Well, Eric, before we go and bring this to a close, is there anything you were hoping to share or get across that you haven’t had a chance to yet?
Dr. Eric Recker (18:12):
Yeah, so this whole self-care thing can be overwhelming. So if somebody’s sitting here right now and they’re facing burnout, I get it. I’ve been there. Control what you can control. And one thing that you can control is how you show up. How you show up has everything to do with those small moment things that you do to take care of yourself. Instead of picking your phone up, take a couple minutes and just take some deep breaths. Instead of doing something else like checking email that makes your head spin even faster, go outside, let the sun get on your forehead for a couple minutes. Always be focusing on what are these small things that I can do to help fill myself back up a little bit. And if you get really good at those things, you’re much less likely to find yourself drained.
Dr. Tom DuFore (19:06):
Eric, thank you so much for a fantastic interview. And let’s go ahead and jump into today’s three key takeaways. So takeaway number one is when he talked about his book, That Dam Analogy!, I thought it was just a clever play on words. It’s certainly a catchy book title, but I love the simplicity of the example or illustration he uses through the use of a dam. And he said we’re all like a dam controlling the energy that flows through us. And he said we have outflows and inflows. And he said most of us, we have the outflow, how we’re impacting the world, what we’re getting done, we have lots and lots of outflows. But he said for most people, we don’t have inflows that are refilling the lake, and we’re not so good at doing that. And it’s important to take a look at why is your dam wide open, that all of your energy just keeps flowing out, but it’s not closing to refill and replenish.
(20:06):
So I thought that was a great thought takeaway number two is when he said burnout starts with overwhelm, it just doesn’t happen where you go from zero to totally burned out. It starts with a little bit of overwhelm and grows. So just think about that, especially with this being at the start of the new year, new goals, new ambitions. We want to get a lot done because we’re motivated, we’ve got big goals for the year, but recognize that we don’t have to get it all done in this very moment. It’s going to be done over time.
(20:38):
And takeaway number three is when he described his miss. I thought this was just a great little reminder for all of us and especially for myself, I find myself lacking focus. But the miss was when he said that he decided to cast a wide net out and he was trying to be all things to all people and was not really accomplishing what he sought out to do. So his advice was stay in your lane. His learning lesson was stay in your lane, keep very focused on what you want to do.
(21:05):
And now it’s time for today’s win-win. So today’s win-win is a perfect fit for our podcast because this is what we do. It’s take some time and define success. And Eric described how he went through that process and it transformed things for him. And I think it’s important for you to think about that. What does success actually mean to you? And I know that I can attest to this as part of the reason why I launched this podcast is to make sure that I get different perspectives on all of these different variations of success because I had in my mind that success equated to things, possessions, money, resources, success in business, whatever that might mean. And there’s a little bit of that, but it was much deeper as I started doing my own soul-searching and looking through. And maybe you’ll find the same for you to think that your true north that you thought the direction you was going was actually maybe you were heading east or west and you were heading that direction, not actually to your true north.
(22:14):
So take a look and see what that looks like. And I thought it was nice with Eric when he described and shared his specific definition of success, which is making a difference in this world that is utterly disproportionate to who I am. And that was his success for him. So I encourage you to take a look at and take a moment, and you could probably do this in just a few minutes, maybe with your spouse, with your husband or wife, and take some time, dig into this and talk about it. And someone close to you might help you figure out what that actually is as well.
(22:47):
And so that’s the episode today, folks. Please make sure you subscribe to the podcast and give us a review. And remember, if you or anyone you know might be ready to franchise or business or take their franchise company to the next level, please connect with us at bigskyfranchise team.com. Thanks for tuning in and we look forward to having you back next week.