Kid Cudi is releasing a memoir titled Cudi.
The Cleveland rapper discusses some of the lowest moments in his life, including a near-fatal overdose while under the influence of cocaine. In Cudi: The Memoir, Mr. Rager, born Scott Mescudi, 41, goes back to a night in his New York apartment in which he took crazy amounts of coke and began crying for hours.
“I was at peace with dying,” he wrote in an excerpt from his book published by GQ. “‘You made great music that people loved,’ I thought. ‘But this is the end.’”
“I couldn’t make sense of what was plaguing me,” he said further into the passage. “It was all happening so fast. The first Man on the Moon had been out for about a year and I was on a rocket ship. Grappling with fame pushed me toward cocaine, which I only ever did alone. I was drawn to it in isolation, and my time by myself was increasing.”
Cudi notes that his cocaine use spiraled from small amounts to snorting “lines that were as wide as my pinky.”
He added, “I was feeling shut-in and I could barely even leave my house. The coke felt like a necessary countermeasure for my celebrity, but it was wreaking havoc on my life, creatively and personally. I had become super volatile emotionally. My relationships were in shambles, and I couldn’t get songs out like I wanted. The anger was boiling in me.
“My rage came from my reality not aligning with my dream,” he confessed. “I thought being set financially was going to save me and make everything all right. I thought being Kid Cudi would transform my life in all the best ways. It didn’t.”
It’s been a tough 2025 for Kid Cudi. Earlier this year, the rapper took the stand to testify against Sean “P. Diddy” Combs during his sex trafficking trial. Cudi explained that while he was dating singer Cassie, whose claims of sexual abuse against the super producer launched the federal case against Combs, someone (allegedly done by Diddy or someone in his crew) set Cudi’s car on fire.
Many, including rapper Young Thug, called Cudi a rat for taking the stand against Diddy.
Cudi recently released “Neverland” and “Grave,” singles from his new album Free, which is set to be released Aug. 22.
